My life in pants

Lemmings

2010-05-06T15:52:00.000-07:00

I'd rather be outside in the rain than inside with the lemmings.

An informed opinion is wholly different than an opinion by itself. An informed opinion is constructed by research and inquiry, while an opinion is more often than not a doppelganger of someone else's opinion, or a single source opinion.

A knee-jerk reaction does not constitute an informed opinion.

It does not.

Do not pass blame, for it doesn't flush.

2010-04-25T05:41:00.000-07:00

If the psychological umbilical cord of blame continues to strangle you, you will never be able to call yourself a true adult. You will remain instead emotionally and mentally a child locked in a dark closet of the past.

A bit of poetry for today

2010-04-19T07:02:00.000-07:00

Poetry time.
---
Dear shitbox,
Dear shitbox,
How you have sat there
Patiently awaiting my needs.

You sat there,
Oh how you sat there,
A little dusty, perhaps
but clean.
You waited,
And waited,
For years for my need.

You turned on most gracefully,
Purring into a waking motion.
No need to oil you, it seems.
That's when you gurgled,
Like you were drowning in the ocean.
And shat heavily upon my dreams.

Dear shitbox,
Oh shitbox,
How I needed you today.
A scanner should work when you need it,
Not purr and then die away.

Oh shitbox!
How could you!
I wish I could bury you at sea.

Some life rules

2010-04-18T04:40:00.000-07:00

Most of my life lessons these past few years have concerned money in some form or another. It is sad that money has to play such a powerful role in our lives, but that is just how it is.

1. Never a lender or borrower be.
2. Never borrow for someone else, or for a business.
3. Business has no loyalty. Bosses are bosses, not friends.
4. Trust no one in business, for business is business.
5. If it is not in writing it does not exist.
6. If you can't help yourself, you can't help others.
7. Don't follow up bad money with good money.
8. Get paid from the start. Don't wait for later.

#3 is important to remember even if you and the boss start out as friends and as equals. It does not remain that way. If your wealth and position does not closely follow, you will not remain on equal standing friendship-wise.

Basically, never borrow or lend money. That is not to say that you should not keep a credit card for emergency car repairs or vacations. But using a card to upgrade your standard of living is foolish. In the end you lose more than you gain.

Lending money is a fools game. It causes friction in day to day life. It can put you behind, it can put you at risk. Some say limit that to never lending more than you can afford (meaning that it will not break you to lose it), but I say don't lend at all. Give it away instead of lending it. You'll be better served emotionally if you do that.

That goes in directly with "if you can't help yourself, you can't help others." If you put yourself at risk by lending money, find yourself in a bad situation, you can no longer help others in need -Those in real need, not just temporarily in need because they blew their money going out on the weekend. There are those who always need help. Always. Those folks will never be able to help you when you are down because they are always down, never up. If they are ever up, they spend it on themselves first. I've noticed that. They try to justify it to you by saying that they've been down for so long that they deserve to enjoy themselves with their money.

---

The new debtors' prison is called a "credit bureau." The sentence is usually 7 to 10 years. Do not serve time for other people's expenses if you can manage it. Do your own time, at your own expense, and for your own expense.

Random Thought

2010-04-18T04:34:00.000-07:00

Remember when someone said "They are in the family way" meant that the person was pregnant? These days what it means is that the person is in therapy.

;)

A sip here, a slip there.

2010-04-16T03:54:00.000-07:00

Drunken memory is never 100% proof.

"Look," she said with a voice full of drink. "Mark said that he believes..."

And that thing I am supposed to believe is not the thing I believe at all, or ever said I did, not even close. The memory of drink (and of drugs) is often a memory that has been diluted, distilled, and has been cleared of any of the microbes of truth. The bottle remains the same, in the same shape, but the content no longer has the intended taste.

It is hard to fix a drunken memory, because to that person the memory is their memory of whatever it is they think they remember. If it isn't on video they will fight you tooth and nail over that memory, even if you have 10 other people who remember it as it really happened.

Live and let live, I like to say, and live and let die. To each his or her own. Let them have their memories, their faulted opinions, their murky recollections. What harm to let them live in their own besotted world! But there is harm, much harm, to be done to you and to others, because those alcohol churned memories seldom go unspoken and unexpressed.

It is a truth that those with the least to say of their own speak volumes on the lives of others.

One hopes and prays that the memory spoken has not been fermented.

Friend, Lover, and Foe.

2010-04-15T12:43:00.000-07:00

People change. When you spark a fire, be that spark a friendship or a romantic relationship, you have to fan it to keep it alive, and add new substance to it to keep it alive, and build on it to make it into a fire. A fire, no matter how big it becomes, still needs constant tending. A fire will die in the stale air of sameness, even if that sameness was once what formed the original ember. People and things change because life does not comfortably abide stagnation.

Twitter is for Twitiots

2010-04-14T12:06:00.000-07:00

Yes, Twitter is for Twitiots.

Why do I say that? Because of the unconsidered element of Twitter. People post instant updates of their lives without considering what they write before they put it out. It is the same problem we faced back in the early days of e-mail: You write it, you send it, you regret it. It is not like the days of writing letters when you wrote the letter but had time to reconsider before sending it, or before the postman took the letter away. E-mail caused a lot of trouble for people because of the finality of it. Once you send it, it's there. Twitter is that, times 100.

I find it slightly humorous that some people have posted updates on Twitter, updates that let people know that the person was not home, and then that person's home got burgled. That's sad, of course, but funny as hell. Cheaters have been caught because of something they posted on Twitter. Some actors have been stalked in the real world because of Twitter updates. People who are engaged in fraud have been bagged because of it (like for Workers Comp fraud). This is all sort of a chuckle to me because those people are such twitiots!

I do not single out Twitter exclusively for this idea of mine of the "twitiot." No, I am just combining twitiocy into one bag, like naming all junk mail Spam. Whenever one posts to the public (and sometimes when it is done in private between select friends) it comes back as hard evidence against one. Posters on Myspace have found that out in great numbers. What they've put on-line has been printed out and used against them in court. E-mail remains to this day a big part of evidence because the days of "he said, she said" are gone forever. E-mail evidence trumps "he said, she said."

Don't even get me started on instant messaging!

Twitter is designed for expressing instant thoughts to masses of people, not just to one other person. Except for the length of the thought, the posting of the thought is often unconsidered - unedited and uncensored. It is not really a tweet, it is a blurt. Sure, you can go back later and edit it, but once it is out there it is out there, it has been seen. A slip of the tongue may haunt a person forever, but a slip of the SEND unreservedly will. Forever.

A person might not be a twit, they might not be an idiot, but chances are, at sometime, they will become a twitiot.

Truth is important

2010-04-05T06:51:00.001-07:00

I sent in part of the post I wrote titled Not All Felonies Are Equal to my local newspaper last week. I received a call the next morning from an editor who wanted to know if I had written it myself, that I had not copied it from some other publication. *laughs*

I had assumed that my letter would show up in the paper the next day or over the weekend. It did not. It showed up today instead. I guess it was smart of them not to put it in during Easter weekend. I say that because my father, when I told him it was in today's paper, read the first part of the first paragraph, grumped, and then tossed the paper aside. He said "That's junk, Mark. I'm sorry, but it's junk!"

*chuckle*

He became so incensed over the first two sentences that he wouldn't read any farther. Of course, he DID go to Easter services yesterday so he was still in the mode that the semi-Christian get themselves into right after going to church. I am sure that a lot of people are going to get huffy over those first couple of sentences. Some will not read the whole letter, and others will read it but read it with an jaundiced eye - Meaning that they won't understand the purpose (or the truth) of what I wrote, becoming mind-locked on their conviction that I wrote something bad about Jesus.

I wrote nothing against Jesus in that letter. I wrote something about society in America, but nothing against Jesus himself. I wrote the truth of the matter, the absolute truth, and that is a thing that Christians are supposedly interested in.

My Minister once told us from the pulpit that he has been asked many times if he would remain a Christian if it were proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Resurrection never happened. He told the congregation that he would not, could not, remain a Christian if that was the case. The truth of the Resurrection is all important, he told us.

The truth... is all important.

I agree with him.

But aside from that, my letter to the paper was edited prior to publication. They changed the title of it from "Not All Felonies Are Equal" to "Hiring Jesus?" and they took out the last paragraph. That made the letter far less important, made it much more inflammatory to Christian folk, and took the heart out of it entirely.

The point of the letter is directed at blanket policies against hiring people with a felony on their record, even if that felony was 25 years ago and the person has had a solid work history since that time with no legal issues. It also goes to felony records for "crimes" that are no longer considered a crime, like interracial relationships or homosexual relationships. The law changing doesn't get that off a person's record. You would think that it would, but it does not. Even now in 2010 people are finding out that their love affair in 1968 with a black person is still on their criminal record, a felony then that is not a felony now, and gay men sentenced for sodomy in 1970 are considered sex offenders today and are listed in the national sex offender database. The laws changing do NOT remove those convictions from those people's records and it can be a very costly business to get those convictions vacated or pardoned.

We are in 2010. You'd think the world would have changed for the better by now.

An Optimistic Poem

2010-04-04T10:20:00.000-07:00

I wrote the previous poem, the pessimistic one, before I wrote this one.

---
Life has left me older now,
Older than I ever dreamed I'd be.
But oh how age was important,
So important,
In my youth to me.

And I never imaged what went with it,
So much responsibility.
And money, and cars, and time,
Became such a necessity.

Long gone are those carefree days,
Days of unbridled youth, Of joy and pain,
Of love in the rain, Of sunny days,
And friendly nights.
But now they are locked a way,
Locked away with the toys,The games,
All those youthful joys, locked away,
Into infinity.

Oh how I wish I had planned before,
For life, And love, And destiny.

But maybe, Just maybe,
I can start again today,
Because tomorrow is, after all,
An unborn day.

A Pessimistic Poem

2010-04-04T10:12:00.000-07:00

I wrote this poem some years ago. I like snarky humor and this shows that. ;)

---
Once I wished upon a winters star,
But nothing even came of that.

Once I wished upon a wishing well,
But you can guess what I got from that.

Life is full of wonders they say,
But someone comes along and buys them,
And from then on to see them you must pay.

Movies show violence,
And sex sells products on TV,
The news is just a talk show,
About people who jog on knobby knees.

They say life can be a pleasure,
But money is the key.
I don't know about you,
But the lock's too big for me.

They say that religion is the answer,
There may be some truth to that.
Perhaps if I were an evangelist my wallet would be big and fat.

Maybe I'll get married,
Get a house, a wife, and a cat.
But the woman would probably turn into a drunk
After we had a screaming brat.

But as long as my wife had money,
I could deal with that.

Things Change

2010-04-04T09:36:00.000-07:00

When we were younger we thought that the people we knew, the places we hung out at, and the courtesy we were given because people knew us, would always be there for us. That is not the way of the world. Things do change.

You know that bar where everyone knows your name? One day it will change and no one will remember you. All it takes is for the employees to quit, one by one, and a few groups of people to change the style of the place. The owner dies, sells out, or decides to make the place more profitable by catering to a different crowd. Suddenly, your place is no longer there for you.

Things change.

Do you have a favorite restaurant where they know what you want before you even look at the menu? One waitress quits and suddenly you are a new client again.

Things change.

There is that one gas station you use all the time. They know you on sight but one day you pull up and find that you have to go inside to pay first. There are new employees now and they don't know you at all, nor do they care to get to know you.

Things change.

You have a best friend who you always spent your time with, helped out of trouble, got into trouble with, and swore to be friends with always. One day you or they will jump into a new relationship or will get married. Within months you will be able to count on one hand how many times you saw each other or spoke in those last months. A few years down the line you will still be able to count those times on the same hand.

Things change.

Your job working with a lot of great people? One day those great people will be gone and you’ll find yourself at the mercy of a new boss who wants to lose you for his own people.

You go to every concert that your favorite band gives feeling cool and part of the gang, part of a special group of devotees, or so you believe. One day you will walk in to find a younger and newer crowd sitting in your spot, all of who will consider you to be the intruder. Some will say you are too old to be there, too old to be a fan of the band, and they are never consciously aware of the age of the lead singer – someone who is usually 10 or more years older than you are yourself.

Are you popular in school?
Are you a cheerleader or jock?
Are you a cool anti-social in your own anti-social group?

Get ready for some hard realizations.

Things change.

Your favorite candy bar from childhood has the same name now as it had back then, but they’ve since changed one or more of the ingredients in it so it no longer has quite the same taste it had when you growing up. Even candy changes.

You can handle change easier if you realize change WILL happen. Enjoy your famous times while you can, live those times to the fullest, for one day such times will go away. Sure, some new things will come your way but they too will end before you are ready for them to. All things change. All things.

And then you will have the memories.

But memory changes too.

;)

Grape Nuts - A History Lesson

2010-04-01T16:04:00.000-07:00

Not too long ago someone asked in a social networking community "why aren't there any grapes or nuts in Grape Nuts." I answered her inquiry with the following:

Grape Nuts was named after the fellow who developed the cereal. Darnell "Grape Nuts" Johnson.

Darnell received this nickname after a high school football injury that discolored part of his anatomy. Initially, he was called "Black Balls". But the injury changed color after three weeks, hence "Grape Nuts" he was dubbed by his teammates. Darnell went to work for POST in 1963, still answering to the nickname "Grape Nuts". He created that cereal and the legend was born. A nickname and an in-joke birthed a cereal for breakfast. Some friends from other cereal companies shared in the joke. "Grape Nuts" Johnson was the inspiration for many different breakfast cereals... “Capt'n Crunch, Crunch Berries, and the old "Freakies" cereal from the 1970's.

---

I was, of course, making a joke using an urban legend as reference. The poster, however, believed me and was upset that the man had to endure such jokes at his expense. I set her right on it, adding in the real history of Grape Nuts.

C.W. Post came up with the name in 1897, because he thought that the "maltose" in the cereal was "grape sugar", and the flavor reminded him distinctly of nuts.

I don't know about you, but I much prefer the legend to the truth.

A friend asked me who it was that believed the story and I replied with "Sarah Palin". Funny thing, but he believe me completely.

;)

Not all felonies are equal

2010-04-01T15:38:00.001-07:00

I was talking today to my friend Rick who can't find a job. His problem, even though he has 21+ years of successful work history that comes after, is that he took a plea deal 25 years ago that gave him a felony conviction. No drugs, no theft, no fraud, no robbery, just being young and dumb and drunk. He's not had so much as a parking ticket since his plea deal, which was 25 years ago this year. I've known him for 15 years and he has worked in some important jobs that dealt with confidential information. Now he finds himself pretty much unemployable in this new modern world. He can't even get a call center or phone tech support job - That despite his many years of working those kind of jobs. It's ridiculous! A more trustworthy person I've never met.

Not all felony convictions are equal. They really are not.

In the strictest sense, Jesus Christ is a felon who was convicted of a capital crime. We may say as a Christian nation that he was unjustly convicted, that he was not morally guilty, but the fact remains that he was indeed convicted under the laws of the time and of the place. In today's scheme of things that means he has a felony on his record. The space of 10 years, 25 years, or 2000 years doesn't expunge it. Changes in society and law don't change it. Death and resurrection don't wipe it away. American courts have held that a felony conviction stands even if the courts later change said offense into a non-felony class, or even if the change makes it no longer a crime at all.

Jesus Christ would be hard pressed to find employment these days because of that felony on his record. It would not matter to employers that the offense he was convicted of is no longer a capital crime, that it is in fact no longer considered a crime at all. The specifics of his case would not matter in the least to those employers, only the strict corporate policy against hiring felons does.

The Son of God couldn't get a JOB - Not in this day and age.

You'd think that 10 or 20 or more years of steady work history would give a person a benefit over an old felony. I guess that even 2000 years isn't long enough to warrant consideration. Not anymore. Not in this America.

The unzipped Word

2010-04-01T14:49:00.000-07:00

I will begin here as I first began in life: Quietly, somewhat confused – That is, until suddenly someone smacked me around for no reason that I could understand at the time. I am quite sure that I will be smacked around for many different reasons, for many assorted causes, here.

One of the reasons I will be smacked around here is because of the writing mistakes I will make. I WILL make mistakes when I write. Try as I might, as hard as I concentrate, I still make mistakes. The truth of the matter is that I cannot self-edit. My mind auto-corrects, it fills in missing words, it adjusts things as I read what it is I have written. That is not uncommon among writers. That is the reason there are professional editors at work today. If all writers could self-edit, there would be no need for editors.

This Blog, this platform for ideas and thoughts and conceptions, is the truth of my life. It is my life, in pants. It is my unzipped word. I will write of my thoughts and opinions when I am wearing my work pants, when I am wearing my relaxing pants, and when I am wearing the various and many pants that we as humans now wear to define ourselves in our society.

The problem with pants though, is that they make it much more likely that you will shit on yourself at some point. But not wearing pants, not fitting in to them, makes it a certainty that you will shit on other people without meaning to. Or, perhaps you do. That would explain a lot of our pundits today.

I will try to always wear pants here and, also, to practice my aim carefully when I choose not to.